Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Tim

I have mentioned my brother Tim in a few posts on this blog.  He is 18 months older than I and born in Boston Mass to Norbert and Elizabeth (Lily).  As children Tim & I were not particularly close as Tim was difficult to get along with.  He had peculiar habits such as relentless teasing, isolating himself, inability to tolerate noise, difficulty connecting with others, inflexibility, and poor social skills.  Needless to say he was not easy to live with.  My mother being a widow dealt with him the best she could.  Back then there was not the support for parents which is present in schools today.

Tim graduated from high school as an above average student because he was determined and studied very hard.  He went on to college and earned his bachelors degree in Biology and then went on to obtain his masters degree in Chemistry.  From there he found a job out of college which lasted for approximately one year.  Unable to find another job he decided to join the USAF.  He went to officer's training school but failed to complete the course satisfactorily.  So even though he had a masters degree he remained in the USAF for 14 years as an enlisted man where he worked in a variety of fields including drafting.  Some of his assignments were at WPAFB, Turkey, and Wyoming.   He finally was forced out of the service due to poor performance reviews which I believe were as a result of his inability to handle the social pressures of the military.

Once back in Dayton he lived here without a job for years living off his savings.  I noticed a gradual increase through the years of paranoid type of behavior which was not present in him as a young man.  Realizing he was soon to be out of money and had no military pension I talked him into going with me out to the VA ER to have him examined.  Knowing I had this one shot at getting him diagnosed I was hopeful but realistic about what to expect as I worked at the VA as a RN for 6 years in the 80's.

Once there I feel God was with us from the moment we stepped into the door.  Everything went so smoothly that I had to wonder if we really were at the VA.  The ER doctor was wonderful and listened to all that I told them about Tim's behavior over the last few years.  He called in a Psychologist to examine him and they decided to keep him for a week in the locked Psych unit to evaluate him.  I was flabbergasted as I never expected things to move so quickly.

At our initial meeting with the Dr. I let her know that I personally thought Tim had a form of Autism with a paranoid aspect but they thought he was schizophrenic.  I really did not care what they diagnosed him with as long as he was diagnosed with something so I could get him help.  All week they did testing and I would come in every day to visit.  Each day he would tell me that this was it and he was only doing this for me and never would again.  By the 4th day the Dr. told me that they had determined he was not schizophrenic and they were not sure what was wrong.  I remember driving home praying to God  to please help the doctors find something.  Surely God did not let everything happen so easily thus far for nothing.   When I came in the next evening the Dr. told me that they had called in another Dr. who has worked in pediatrics in the past.  She did some testing with Tim and determined that he had Asperger's autism!

                               to be continued...............................

2 comments:

  1. I THOUGHT THIS BLOG WAS ABOUT THE PADDY LILY, NOT ABOUT OTHERS. PS:THE INDIVIDUAL IN QUESTION SERVED IN THE MILITARY FOR 14,NOT 16 YEARS

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  2. Tim emailed me this about two days after I posted the above.

    KERRY BETH, WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH YOUR NARRATIVE ABOUT ME? I CAN'T STAND THE SUSPENSE

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